Leo Messi scores his hat trick over the weekend. But this is not so much about his skills as sublime as they are but Ray Hudson's orgasmic Gol TV commentary that accompanies those goals. "Nothing less than the equivalent of a footballing bird of paradise. He is like Dr Spock, out off his Vulcan mind" .
"I'm higher than a hippie at Woodstock" or "He's as competitive as a hungry tiger, yet he's got the sensibility of a village priest" or "We all know Valderrama's big hair is covering the eyes in the back of his head."
Here are more Hudsonianisms >>